The Row (2018)

Directed by: Matty Beckerman | 86 minutes | horror, thriller | Actors: Lala Kent, Randy Couture, Natali Yura, Shea Buckner, Mia Rose Frampton, Colin Egglesfield, Tyler Jon Olson, Malea Rose, Jennifer Titus, Dylan Sprayberry, Lexi Atkins, Katelyn MacMullen, Paul Antoine, Sarah McDaniel, Corey Eid

Horror films have been on the rise for a few years now and may well be called the most popular genre in cinema next to superhero films. The movement is also very diverse and also reaches lovers of the better cinema. ‘Hereditary’ and ‘Us’ are good examples of this. Interesting horror films are increasingly being shown in the halls and the digital video library that, in addition to showing atrocities, also have an in-depth story to offer. Unfortunately, there are also productions like ‘The Row’…

In ‘The Row’, a student fraternity is terrorized by a serial killer. This butcher prefers to turn the gorgeous students into lifeless dolls. After each murder, the perpetrator leaves the corpse behind as if it were a made-up doll. Who is behind these terrible deeds? A police officer (Randy Couture) investigates and tries to protect the girls.

While the horror genre seems to be evolving lately into a genre that intelligently highlights human fears and vulnerabilities, ‘The Row’ is a big step back. Movies like ‘The Invisible Man’, ‘Midsommar’ and ‘Get Out’ tackle themes of abuse of women, breakups and racism in an entertaining way that makes you think at the same time. These films want to tell something about the state of the world, while also being entertaining. ‘The Row’ is of a completely different caliber.

This film by Matty Beckerman is in fact quite infantile and poorly filmed, so that you get a bad view of the murders thanks to swishing camera work. The raison d’être of ‘The Row’ is the presence of (Instagram) models in their twenties who have to play frivolous teenagers. These ladies wear sexy clothes that you don’t see quickly (let alone a lot) in the streets. The female beauty in this film is blessed with the looks and not the brains, which means that the body count is quite high. Sounds nice, but the lame way in which they come to an end is not interesting. What remains is a pointless and superfluous slasher that in no way impresses let alone entertains. This is cinematic wallpaper.