F*ck Love (2019)

Directed by: Appie Boudellah, Lodewijk van Lelyveld | 96 minutes | romance, comedy | Actors: Thijs Romer, Yolanthe Cabau, Edwin Jonker, Bo Maerten, Victoria Koblenko, Maurits Delchot, Défano Holwijn, Soundos El Ahmadi

If there is one genre that attracts a lot of people to the cinemas, it is the Dutch romantic comedy. But it is also the genre in which public opinion is furthest away from the opinion of film critics. Of course there are the exceptions – think of ‘Everything is love’ (2007), its successor ‘Everything is family’ (2012), ‘Soof’ (2013) and more recently for example ‘Weg van je’ (2017) – but in general the level of the Dutch romkom leaves something to be desired. Apparently the public doesn’t care about that, as long as they get a lot of familiar faces, a not too complicated story, a smooth editing and a few cool jokes. And as long as people flock to the cinemas to watch films such as ‘Crazy of Happiness’ (2017), ‘Men van Mars’ (2018) and ‘Heavily in love’ (2018) – all three attracted at least 100,000 visitors and thus won a Golden Film on hold – to go and see, the Dutch romkom remains a lucrative business for filmmakers.

Such a Golden Film is undoubtedly also reserved for ‘F*ck de Liefde’ (2019), the first feature film by Lodewijk van Lelyveld (who mainly gained experience as director of TV series such as ‘Good times, bad times’ and ‘Spangas ‘) and Appie Boudellah (co-writer of the teen film ‘Fashion Chicks’ from 2015). A film that could have come from Johan ‘Costa’ Nijenhuis just like that, because ‘F*ck de Liefde’ follows a tried and tested recipe: open a can of ‘soapies’, fill them with a few YouTube stars and let they muddle together in a sunny setting. Lisa (Bo Maerten) is fed up with the adulterous behavior of her husband Jack (Edwin Jonker) and wants to divorce him. To cheer her up a bit, her friend Donna (Nicolette van Dam) invites her for a carefree holiday on Curaçao; Kiki (Nienke Plas) is also coming along. But Lisa can’t really relax, so when the sympathetic sandwich seller Jim (Thijs Römer) shows his interest in her, Lisa stops the boat. Meanwhile, player Jack continues to pick up women; he has his sights set on the self-assured Cindy (Victoria Koblenko), but she won’t be easily tricked. Meanwhile, Jack’s best friend Said (Maurits Delchot) is trapped in a loveless marriage to career woman Bo (Yolanthe Cabau), who thinks he’s a bad father. If he also loses his job, he does not dare to tell her and keeps up appearances.

‘F*ck love’ paints a rather gloomy and hypocritical picture of relationships: the women speak contemptuously and suspiciously of men (and if you see how they behave, they have every reason to do so), but are secretly not her better. These are not characters that we embrace without difficulty; in fact, most leave us cold. Only world traveler Jim seems to have something sincere. Could it be because Thijs Römer is by far the best actor we see in action here? The bumbling father Said also has a bit of a gun factor – at least he brings some life to the brewery – but then again he does such stupid things that we shake our head and wonder if he is worth our sympathy. ‘F*ck de Liefde’ is not only burdened by a shortage of appealing and/or layered characters, but also by a glaring lack of chemistry between the protagonists and an excess of flat humor. Think of humor of the level ‘child accidentally swallows Viagra pill during children’s party and whimpers because of the pain in his pee’, ‘children play with condoms while their father and uncle have an STD test’ and ‘dumb drunk woman pees expensive shoes from girlfriend before revealing to her secret love that she is madly in love with him in a confused argument’. The humor is as flat as the characters and their motivations.

There are undoubtedly hordes of people who rush to the cinema for this kind of flat entertainment. Who doesn’t care that ‘F*ck de love’ is just as one-dimensional and vulgar as the title suggests. And who ignore the fact that they have forgotten this mediocre and meaningless Dutch romkom in no time. We would like to say to all those people: enjoy your evening.