Goal – Dhan Dhana Dhan Goal (2007)

Directed by: Vivek Agnihotri | 165 minutes | drama, romance, sports | Actors: John Abraham, Bipasha Basu, Arshad Warsi, Naveen Andrews, Dibyendu Bhattacharya, Kate Carter, Saurad Dubey, Boman Irani, Gilbert Montoya, Kushal Punjabi, Sanjay Sharma, Dalip Tahil, Rajendranath Zutshi, Monty Singh

Making a successful, exciting sports film, with effective drama and romance turns out not to be so easy, as ‘Dhan Dhana Dhan Goal’ shows, from director Vivek Agnihotri, who made his debut with ‘Chocolate’, a practical copy of Bryan Singers crime thriller ‘The Usual Suspects’. In his latest film, Agnihotri, following in the footsteps of ‘Lagaan’ and ‘Chak De India’ – which dealt with cricket and hockey respectively – focuses on a sport for playing out various dramatic developments. Unfortunately, the film falls too short in terms of sporting tension and drama.

Although the film lasts just under three hours, the director seems to be in a hurry to get to the dramatic premise of the story. After briefly glancing at the football stadium in question and getting acquainted with (initial) protagonist Shaan (Arshad Warsi) and his wife in the setting of her (parents’) kebab restaurant, the dramatic prospect of the loss of the Southall stadium has already been introduced. This comes way too soon, because since the viewer hasn’t gotten a good impression of the group as a whole, and hasn’t seen them play football as a team yet, it’s very hard to care about the characters and their issues. At the bar of the kebab restaurant, one of the team members gets very emotional when he talks about football. That’s why he came to England from India, but it feels empty and like a mandatory bit of dialogue that should give the story a little extra weight. Especially the first half of the film, the director races from plot point to plot point, without building up these moments properly. As a result, only the melodramatic form remains, without spectator involvement.

As is often the case in Bollywood films, the drama is way over the top again. In discussing the future, and imminent demolition of the stadium, Shaan even finds it necessary to bring in India’s struggle for independence to bolster his argument. There are also usually tears at these moments, and by default these scenes are accompanied by a bombastic choir on the soundtrack. The way the plot twists are deployed is unfortunately quite contrived. A character who suddenly has a heart attack, or an internal dilemma that is made explicit by the appearance of another character’s father that literally clarifies everything. A cliché element such as the reluctant, but talented old coach who nevertheless shows up to help the team out of the fire, hardly develops. The script is, for all these reasons and more, the biggest obstacle. The team building that should be central, and that was so well developed – with a clear design of each individual – in the cricket film ‘Lagaan’, is only partially illustrated here. Instead, unnecessary stories are added about old traumas and childish jealousy, and football is usually not portrayed in a particularly exciting or well-organized manner. The filmmakers are not particularly careful with the rules either, which only reinforces the artificiality of the whole.

The romance in the film between Sunny and Rumana, despite the unrealistic – or at least inconclusive – presence of Bipasha Basu as the team’s physiotherapist, is minor, but still quite subtle, which is refreshing. And Basu and Abraham are, as Rumana himself literally says in the film, very sexy and therefore fit well together. Abraham is especially eye candy for the women, but fulfills the role of tough football hunk well. He often appears in sweatpants or tight-fitting shirts, and with his half smile and smoldering look, he will make many women’s hearts beat faster. When he actually tries to act, things go less well, but the script is also to blame. The focus of the film gradually shifts from the battle for Southall’s stadium to Sunny’s cultural identity crisis. Does he choose his Indian roots or the country where he was born? In itself it is interesting to examine the different loyalties and cultural ties of a second-generation immigrant, and there is at least one valuable substantive moment between Sunny and his father in the film, in which he claims to be a full-fledged British citizen, since he was born there, but too many scenes come across as too polarizing; too black and white. The English are too often portrayed as racists, and it is suggested that Sunny will never be taken for granted in an English team because of his “tan”.

Fortunately, there is one acting person who manages to keep the viewer’s attention from time to time and that is Boman Irani, who plays coach Tony Singh. Not every scene or facial expression finds the right tone, but at least he manages to give his role some humanity and depth. His initial encounters with the team are fairly amusing, and his one-on-one football game in the rain with Abrahams is, though clichéd, entertaining.

Irani’s acting and Basu and Abraham’s good looks provide some bright spots, but are far from sufficient to save ‘Dhan Dhana Dhan Goal’ from destruction. The weak, messy script and the largely lack of tension in the football scenes, in which only Abrahams seems credible, irrevocably kill the film.