A Perfect Getaway (2009)

Directed by: David Twohy | 100 minutes | horror, thriller | Actors: Milla Jovovich, Chris Hemsworth, Timothy Olyphant, Steve Zahn, Marley Shelton, Kiele Sanchez, Dale Dickey, Katie Chonacas, Wendy Braun, Travis Willingham, Peter Navy Tuiasosopo, Tory Kittles, Mercedes Leggett, Angela Sun, Elizabeth Maxwell, Brian Tester , Natalie Garza, Lindsay Halladay, Lindsey Huang, Leif Riddell, Spencer Hill, Katelin Chesna Henke, Matt Birman, Webster Williams, Gugun Deep Singh, Ryan Gesell, Andy Hoff, John T. Cogan, Brandon Olive, Michael Traynor, Luka Apt

The American film ‘A Perfect Getaway’ has a synopsis that is as predictable as it is exciting. A newlywed couple embarks on a trek across Hawaii just as another couple targets… newlyweds. Then one couple meets another couple and another couple and soon none of the couples knows what to think of the fellow couples. Sounds like: ten little niggers in Hawaii. Murder and manslaughter and a lot of tension.

Not so. The first hour of this thriller passes in frantic boredom, with the only highlight being Kiele Sanchez’s golden-brown buttocks. There is some chatter about who the killers might be, a little pressing question since you do wish all characters a violent death in Hawaii. Furthermore, the time is filled with weak dialogues. The male lead is a screenwriter, so forced comments are made about acts, screenwriting and the role of characters. Apart from an incidental and sought-after scare, the first hour limps by in this way.

Then it gets really bad.

After an hour there is a twist that is so unlikely that ‘unbelievable’ does not cover the charge by far. Simultaneously with that idiotic twist, the film transitions – during a flashback – to an arty register. Black and white images, split screens and dialogues that assume psychological depth. After a minute or so that arty belch is over and we continue in the same conventional style as before. Remarkable.

Fortunately, the last twenty minutes of this long sit still offer some fun. Then at least there will be chopped, slapped and shot. We also experience a few nice scare moments, however improbable they are otherwise. A matter of too little too late: ‘A Perfect Getaway’ has been hopelessly lost from the very start. There is then a great temptation to build a bridge between the title of the film and the exit of the cinema. Let’s not.