The Three Investigators and the Secret of Terror Castle – T3I: The Three Investigators: Mission 2: Terror Castle (2009)

Directed by: Florian Baxmeyer | 97 minutes | adventure, family | Actors: Chancellor Miller, Nick Price, Cameron Monaghan, James Faulkner, Anette Kemp, Jonathan Pienaar, Ron Smerczak, Martin Le Maitre, Catherine Cooke, Julia Bremermann, Axel Milberg

Why? Why watch ‘The Three Investigators’ when there are much better movies out there? Then think of ‘The Goonies’ and ‘Spy Kids’. Movies that are much more inventive, fun and exciting than this series that takes itself too seriously. And never becomes exciting, fun, funny or remarkable. The film does not provoke emotions.

The title heroes embark on a new adventure when they find a videotape showing Jupiter Jones’ parents. The mini-detective’s old folks are long gone, but Jones discovers they were private detectives like him. His parents died on their last job. The three friends decide to solve the case and come into contact with the wacky inventor Terril, who lives in a deserted forest in Northern California.

The biggest objection to watching this film is that it is such a loveless mess. This production was made with dollar signs in the eyes. It was a must and no one seems to be genuinely enjoying it. A mortal sin for a youth film. The energy is missing.

The film hints at James Bond (the gadgets) and Harry Potter (the three heroes), but lacks the charm of those films. The acting is not noteworthy (Jupiter Jones is a far too boring character who sees himself as a kind of James Bond minus the self-mockery), the stunts are soporific and the storyline is soporific. Kids aren’t the most critical of movie watchers, but they deserve better than this.

‘Spy Kids’ may not have been original, but it was made with love. The cast was up for it, did their best, and the jokes were timeless. ‘The Goonies’ was really exciting and funny and took the young target audience seriously. ‘Harry Potter’ grows with the fans and becomes more and more mature. ‘The Three Investigators’ is a cynical way of stealing the youngsters’ pocket money (or their parents’ salary).